Friday, November 11, 2005


Duncan and the Kool-Aid Killers

If any kind of bubble came into existence during the time between Ricky's game winner against the Grizzlies and tip off tonight, it burst around minute three of this disaster. The Celtics fell behind early with careless turnovers and bad shots, made a 2nd quarter comeback against a half-interested Spurs bench, and were slaughtered with unsettling ease in the second half. In short, it was a game that demonstrates just how far we are from competing with the true elite in the NBA.

The drama that is Doc's rotations continued, with Perk inexplicably sitting, Gomes getting early minutes, and Dickau playing more quality minutes than than an ineffective Delonte West. Of course, Scalaburine got minutes over Perk because he wears Daddy Danny's uniform number, and unsuprisingly he put in his usual pitch for CelticsDoom Worst Celtic of the Game. Will he win it again? Read on to find out!

In other player related news, if Delonte came crashing to Earth with comatose D and a 4-12, then Blount crashed straight though to the planet's core and spent time with the evil Magma men as he checked in with the most ineffective 16 minutes anyone not named Scalabrine has had in the NBA this year. And perhaps the most important player development tonight was the season's first official sighting of Evil Pierce, who in the 3rd quarter showed up pouting, complaining to the refs and hogging the ball. Welcome back Evil Pierce! It's been awhile.

Player of the Game - Tim Duncan. He came to work, punched in, and recorded the easiest 29/12 night of his career against a succession of Celtic pussies named Blount, Raef and Urine-brine.

Worst Celtic of the Game - Tough call, there were so many nominees: Delonte West who was torched all night by Tony Longoria-Parker, Mark Blount for registering a classic 3/1 game, Brian Scalabrine for general suckitude. But no, tonight the booby prize goes to Ricky Davis for what I would say was his worst game as a Celtic. 5-17, 3 turnovers, just in general shitty game where nothing he did seemed right. No shame Ricky, you were hardly alone.

Quote of the Night - "Yeah, but he gave a real good upfake" - Tommy. Classic garbage time boosterism by our man Heinsohn, putting the positive spin on Delonte West blowing a shot from about 7 inches away from the basket. Way to go Tommy! Give yourself an eponymous point!

It Has Now Become Abundantly Clear - that the "quotes" FSN promo featuring Gerald Green breathily intoning that "a leader is a dealer in hope" and several other hugely uncomfortable "hope" quotes read by young Celtics players, is perhaps, the single worst thing I've ever seen on television.

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