Friday, October 21, 2005


Preseason Game 5 - turns out we are worse than Crap-tors

An ugly, jagged game that at times seemed reminiscent more of the summer leagues than the halfway point of the exhibition season. The second unit once again disintigrated and couldn't buy a basket against an inferior batch of Craptors. In a battle of draft-slippers, Joey Graham looked nasty, Gerald Geen looked dopey. At least UConn alumni got to see something they had never seen before - a guy with the name "Villeneuva" on his jersey who actually looked like he was playing hard.

Nonetheless, Celtics fans gave a shit about one thing and one thing only - the return of Al Jefferson.

Big Al was, in a word, rusty. He missed a couple easy shots and looked a bit low on energy. After the game he bitched about having to tape his ankles. Whatever. He's back and he'll get better, but I get the impression that only an injury is going to let him crack the starting lineup before December.

We now go to the official CelticsDoom "up and down meter" to tell the rest of the story:

UP - Dan Dickau. The point situation is still a matter of "which one is the least bad?" but ole' Dickface turned in a decent performance, knocking down jumpers like he used to do when he played for other teams that paid him less. His improvement at the point could well be because he was actually playing shooting guard for most of the game. Orien Greene was solid, but I have to think that Dickau is in the lead for the backup spot if for no other reason than to keep Danny from looking like a complete fool.

DOWN - Justin Reed. This guy is too wired or too eager or something. He's forces everything on offense and seems destined for permanent 11th man status. He didn't get into the game until the 3rd quarter, so goodbye chance-at-starting-job. You watch him play and you just want to shake him and say, "don't be so weird." Could redeem himself, however - we feel all hope is not lost.

UP - Paul Pierce. Those passes to Raef, my God, it was as if he read CelticsDoom all summer and decided to make us look like bigger losers than we already are. Maybe the key is to play him 29 minutes and tell him the game doesn't count. Seems to keep the Captain on an even keel.

DOWN - Mark Blount. Turns out it DOES rhyme with "cunt." Given his supposed love of fine wine and cigars, I now feel obliged to call him "the cuntinental."

Tomorrow night - the Celtics invade our home turf with a "home" game against the Nets at the local casino. This is likely to be attended by dozens and dozens of comped drunks and busted out slot jockeys. Look for our banners EVERYWHERE.

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