Sunday, January 23, 2005


Celtics at Hawks 1/22/05

A disturbing, stomach churning loss. This one was as sickening as that fat guy exfoliating his skin in the Mohegan Sun ad (key quote “the guys at Mickeys would really bake my scrod if they knew I was here”).

Ironically, this disaster started out promising with the long-overdue insertion of Tony Allen into the starting lineup, where he responded with a career high 20 points. This wasn’t some kind of lucky 20 either, it was big-boy real deal stuff. My sources tell me that Jiri Welsch was seen after the game phoning his agent and wiping nervous vomit off his lips in the locker room.

Similarly promising was the fact that Delonte West was the first Celtic point guard off the bench. If Marcus Banks has TiVo, he’ll start weeping when he hears Doc tell the world in the pre-game interview that Delonte is the “best Celtics defender at the point.“ That, coupled with Delonte’s 5 minute ass-kicking the night before should have spelled the end of the Marcus Banks era in Boston, but unfortunately when Delonte got in the game, he pressed, tried to do too much, and was yanked after 5 minutes. Banks was decent, if uninspired, but at least seemed to remember that point guards are supposed to pass the ball. This drama would have come to a quick conclusion had Delonte played well, but now it looks like we’re going to have the same miserable log-jam at point that we have at the 2/3, and that spells doom for a cohesive offense with Payton off the floor.

Anyway, the game - we had a 17 point lead on these morons and managed to blow it. We built the lead with Perk and Al on the floor, so of course Doc had to limit their minutes in the 2nd half. Same story as the last game - Waltah comes in, the lineups get weird, everything gets fucked up, and the game slips slowly out of our fingers. I am convinced that Doc makes the worst substitutions of any coach I’ve ever seen besides John Carroll, who was simply the worst coach ever to get an NBA paycheck.

Other factors - Payton looked tired and missed a lot of open shots. More of this “going small” idiocy with the wrong players (namely Waltah and I hate to say it, Jiri). Hey Doc! It works when it means you have your best guys on the floor - Pierce, Ricky, Big Al, Payton and Tony Allen. These guys, along with Raef, Perk and West, are the only Celtics that should be getting regular minutes. And guess what, that’s a solid 8-man rotation, just like normal teams use!

Anyway, Raef played really well. Pierce wasn’t awful. Tony Allen was incredible so he probably won’t get off the bench next game.

Player of the Game - Antoine. He hit that 3 that crippled us at the end. Rest assured, if we get him back he will never hit shots like this for us.

Worst Celtic of the Game - Doc Rivers. The game was thrown away because the team lost focus and they had terrible lineups on the floor at key points in the game (Jiri/Ricky/Perkins/McCarty/West ?!!!). Doc has either lost them or they were never there. The guys at Mickeys should be baking his scrod.

Quote of the Night - “This is an NBA-TV game, we’re supposed to at least resemble something impartial.” - Mike Gorman, the great unsung hero of Celtics broadcasts. The man used to fly for the Navy yet somehow wound up with the task of propping up an NBA quasi-legend who is more concerned with being the next Johnny Most than he is with providing a coherent broadcast. Imagine what these games would be like without him.

<< Home

This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?